I, more than anyone, enjoy the *magic* that comes with the holiday season. The decorations, the glitter, nostalgia, the music – all of it! – except for The Elf on the Shelf. From my point of view as a child therapist, December 1st brings with it increased anxiety and meltdowns from children who are just trying to keep it together so that Santa will not see them as being “bad.” The Elf also makes parents feel the stress of being the “keepers of the magic,” and despite their best efforts to avoid bringing an elf into their house, they start the tradition so that children don’t feel left out. And, while I understand that the Elf cannot be eliminated entirely, maybe there is a way to do it differently. Less about keeping score for Santa, and more enjoying the holidays together.

With that in mind, here are 12 ideas for a different kind of Elf this holiday season:

1. Craft Elf:: The Elf brings some craft supplies for the children to create something. Bonus points if it is something to create to give to another person! Double Bonus points if caregivers participate.
2. Card Elf:: The Elf brings a card for children to decorate, and then they can decide who they would like to send the card to. Perhaps someone who needs some holiday cheer?
3. Gratitude Elf:: The Elf brings an “attitude of gratitude,” and states something he is grateful for but also brings thoughtful questions for children to think of what they are grateful for or ideas of how children can create acts of service for others. 
4. Hide-and-Go-Seek Elf:: Who says the parents need to do all the work? Break the “don’t touch the elf” rule and have the children hide the elf for the parents to find. You’ll create a fun, memorable activity for the entire family to enjoy. 
5. Silly Elf:: The Elf brings a joke or a clever riddle for the family to figure out and enjoy together. 
6. Photo Book Elf:: Everyone picks one photo a day and gives them to the elf, who compiles a photo book to look through by Christmas time. 
7. Secret Message Elf:: The elf can deliver messages or drawings/trinkets to a sibling or friend, and at the end of a set amount of time, the secret person is revealed!
8. Giveaway elf:: Need to clear out some toys? The Elf can take a toy to a child in need each night.
9. Game night Elf:: The Elf decides what game the family may play together – it can be as simple as Simon Says! – and sometimes the Elf brings a new game for the family to enjoy.
10. Recipe Elf:: The Elf brings recipes that the family can create together- one day it is cookies, next day it is a creative snack.
11. Book Elf:: The Elf chooses a story or even brings a new book each night for the family to read together.
12. Compliment Elf:: The Elf brings kind words about a family member each morning and then the family also shares some love by adding more kind words to that person.

If you want to do the tradition Elf, I’ll understand, but these ideas promote connection and time spent together. After all, it is in the time we spend together during the holidays laughing, creating, sharing, and giving that make up the real holiday magic that lasts us long after Santa and the Elf go back to the North Pole. Happy Holidays!

Erin Troup, LPC, NCC, CT, IMH-E (IV Clinical)